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Mutuality | Blog + Magazine | Summer 2019

The print + digital magazine of CBE International

Mutuality offers articles from diverse writers who share egalitarian theology and explore its intersection with everyday life.

Blog + Magazine Articles

The opinions expressed in these articles are those of the authors. They do not purport to reflect the opinions or views of CBE International or its members.

Cover of summer 2019 Mutuality

Summer 2019

Volume: 26 | Number: 2

Dating While Egalitarian

When it comes to navigating romantic relationships, patriarchal patterns appear at every turn. The good news is it doesn’t have to be this way. Egalitarians the world over are setting aside patriarchal norms, doing the work of identity re-formation, modeling romantic relationships that better reflect Scripture’s ideal, and challenging the idolization of marriage in some circles. In this issue, our authors invite you on that journey with them.


Smart Women and Fragile Men: How Patriarchy Shapes Identity and Romance
By: Tim Krueger | June 5, 2019
Do men want to date smart women? This was the question behind a 2015 study published by the Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin.1 What the study learned is that men like the idea of dating women who are smarter than them, but when they meet an actual woman who fits the profile, they suddenly become much [...]

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Welcome to the Jungle: The Dating Adventures of a  Fifty-Something Egalitarian
By: Cindy J. Hurd | June 5, 2019
It is crucial that we women who don’t fit into the church’s too-neat “happily ever after” narrative share our stories. Because God sees our struggles and the church should too.

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Single. Dating. Female. Pastor: 5 Things I Want the Church to Know
By: Alicia McClintic | June 5, 2019
Recently, I was invited to participate in a panel on singleness at a Christian conference. I shared my experience as a single woman pastor and how single clergy can feel isolated in a church culture where marriage is the default. It was the first time since university that I had an honest, direct, public conversation [...]

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What If Singleness Isn’t Failure?
By: Krysti Wilkinson | June 5, 2019
No one says the word “failure” out loud, of course. No one would dare. But when marriage is the ideal that everyone is working toward, anything that falls short feels like you did something wrong.

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Lessons from Eliezer:  What an Old Testament Matchmaker Has to Say About Egalitarian Dating
By: Kay Bonikowsky | June 5, 2019
Dating is difficult in today’s culture. As I have counseled single women and men through the years, I often heard pleas for help to find a Christian person to date. And let’s be honest. There are many different kinds of Christians. How does one get help to find a similar kind of Christian? [...]

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A Tale of Two Rapes: What Tamar and Bathsheba Teach Us About Power, Consent, and Sexual Violence
By: Erin Moniz | June 5, 2019
While it is not addressed nearly enough from the pulpit, Scripture has important information about power, patriarchy, and sexual rhetoric. When we miss these elements in reading the Bible, we are more likely to misinterpret what we see in the world around us.

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Debunking Eros: Why Romantic Love Isn't the Only Love Worth Having
By: Mimi Haddad | June 5, 2019
A recent study suggested that, though casual sex is more accepted than ever, loneliness is too. Twenty-seven percent of Americans feel isolated, but loneliness is far worse among eighteen to twenty-two year-olds, followed by Millennials. The least lonely were Americans aged seventy-two and older—those having fewer sexual encounters.

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It’s Time for a Sexual Ethic Jesus Might Have Actually Preached
By: Lyndsey Medford | June 5, 2019
Consent: a word so bland I once found it almost ugly. Why would I base my framework for romantic relationships on a word as flippant and perfunctory as a waiver to have my photo taken? Bodies and relationships are deeply important to me as a Christian. Naturally, sex is also deeply important to me. Even [...]

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Three women smiling at the camera, each is holding a present.

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