Cecilie Croissant hopes that Tools for Ministry Leaders to Help Victims of Abuse “will be a valuable manual that will inspire Christian leaders and believers to pursue further training and study to begin to change the existing faulty mindsets” (Preface) surrounding abuse in their ministries. It’s clear that she has experience helping women in abusive circumstances as she shares her wisdom in how church and ministry leaders can do the same.
She begins by sharing a note about her gender-specific language, citing statistics showing that while men may experience abuse in relationships, women are much more likely to experience physical violence. Later in the manual, Croissant defines different types of abuse and how they interrelate to one another in abusive relationships.
Croissant shares the case study of Jules Woodson in chapter one, describing how her disclosure of sexual abuse at the hands of her youth pastor was mishandled. The leaders did not report it to the police, and Jules Woodson experienced horrible spiritual abuse from the leaders that trickled down to the congregation. At the end of the chapter, Croissant offers six steps that must be taken so this type of response doesn’t happen again—having a code of conduct, reporting abuse accurately, obtaining external help, supporting the victim, warning the congregation, and calling abuse by its name.
In chapter two, Croissant shares startling statistics related to domestic violence. Though some of her statistics are dated, from 1999 or 2010, they highlight the violence that women endure and fear the world over—including in the United States. Finally, Croissant discusses the response of the church; or, better articulated, the lack of response and the perpetuation of the cycle of violence through patriarchal theologies.
Chapter three is a helpful resource as Croissant defines the different types of abuse that can be experienced—physical, sexual, spiritual, emotional, mental abuse and gaslighting, pornography, and double abuse—and includes insights from other experts to help readers understand how each impacts victims.
After defining the different types of abuse, in chapter four Croissant discusses what the Bible says about violence and abuse.1 She reflects on God as the deliverer who resists the violent and proud, the association of violence with wickedness and evil, and the teachings of Jesus, Paul, and James. As with the other chapters, Croissant offers practical insight for how Christian community is to respond to violence in support of the victim.
In chapter five, Croissant tackles that “the majority of pastors admit to lack of training in this area,” and the risk this fact poses to women who share with pastors that they are experiencing abuse (49). She advocates not only for further training for pastors, but also that those in leadership refer people to the proper professionals. She believes that couple’s counseling is not an appropriate response to abuse because abuse is not a shared responsibility—it is the responsibility of the abuser to get the help they need before couple’s counseling begins (51). Lastly, Croissant discusses the importance of re-rooting the victim in the love of God (55–56). This may be a step that takes time, especially after the victim has experienced physical abuse at the hands of their spouse or spiritual abuse at the hands of their spiritual leaders.
Chapter 6 discusses the root of abusive behaviour, and Croissant debunks commonly held but false beliefs about abuse. She says that “abuse is first of all about control and power” (57). She then describes the mindsets that abusers may inhabit, and the difference between narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and abuse, which is very illuminating. While NPD is a diagnosis within the psychiatric field, often demonstrated by the “trail of relationships left behind,” abusers can hide their abusiveness “for a lifetime” (60).
Chapter seven is perhaps the most important part of the manual because it discusses practical ways to provide help to women who are trying to leave abusive relationships. There is a wealth of information within this chapter, and it has suggestions that readers may have never considered, such as what information to gather and helping the victim leave abusive situations (68–71). Readers would be wise to take the time to go through this chapter carefully.
In chapter eight, Croissant shares practical suggestions for how church leadership can respond to disclosures of abuse. This is especially relevant in churches that support a patriarchal or complementarian theology, which, as she established in earlier chapters, are places where domestic abuse is more likely to occur (28, 43, 50).
Croissant addresses how an abuser should be treated in chapter nine. It is important that they are held accountable for their actions (85–87). Relying on the expertise of Chuck Derry, who spent decades working with abusers, she offers thirteen ways to maintain the accountability of the abuser. She also discusses the helpfulness of group therapy for an abuser (88).
Chapter ten provides practical information on the warning signs to look for at the beginning of a relationship. What are his views on women? Is he “love-bombing” you? How does he speak to you and about the women from previous relationships? The chapter concludes by discussing the role of women in church leadership, and Croissant shares, “As long as we preach an inferior role of women in the church and marriage, we create a culture and mindset that allow for abuse to go unchecked” (91).
A question typically asked in discussion about abuse is, “What does the Bible say about divorce?” In chapter eleven, after discussing passages where God divorces himself from his people, Croissant brings much-needed historical context to divorce within ancient Judaism. There were clear practices that were harming women, such as husbands leaving wives in a vulnerable position through divorce, and the teaching of Jesus addressed those instances (99). Lastly, she discusses the reasons pastors struggle to handle abusive husbands. These are four insightful points, including lack of awareness, seeing abuse as a relationship problem instead of an abuse problem, lack of training, and harmful theology (104–105). While each of these may seem obvious, she still has to say them.
Chapter twelve is important for church leadership because it offers important steps for creating a Code of Conduct within the church. Croissant lists thirteen ways a woman may experience abuse that can be included in the Code of Conduct and shared with the congregation to “raise awareness about what proper behaviour is” (108). This chapter has step-by-step suggestions on how to create one’s own Code of Conduct and define the repercussions for improper behaviour.
In the final chapter, Croissant roots her book in the whole story of the Bible, which emphasizes the importance of equality in the body of Christ with Jesus as our head. Yet, despite the call to be different, the “church has often conformed to the world by clinging to worldly philosophies of gendered (and racial) oppression” (118). This final chapter is a call to action for the Church.
I recommend this book for any spiritual leader. It’s accessible and straightforward. Croissant offers strong Scriptural support for her arguments, and practical advice for leaders. While some of the data may be dated, it still provides a clear understanding of the issue of abuse and how the church can respond.
1. Croissant writes that double abuse “takes place when an individual or organization responds to an abuse victim with criticism, minimizations, taking a neutral stance, asking questions that indicate the victim is at fault, or pulling away” (Ch. 2).