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The idea of submission is neither a cultural norm nor an accepted virtue. The human heart, untouched by God’s grace in salvation, naturally wants things its way and the voice of culture screams to us at every turn that getting what we want is most important.
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If you embrace the theological position that God the Son is eternally (read “permanently”) subordinate to God the Father and then ground your belief that submission of the wife to the husband is permanently true because of this theological position, then what does Mt. 22:30 mean?
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The oppression of women spans centuries and borders. In virtually every country and culture in the world, women have less-than-equal status to men and they are often relegated to subservient and submissive roles. Women suffer from domestic violence, job barriers, lack of control over their bodies, and fewer options for healthcare. They often do not have a voice in matters as broad as politics or as narrow as what happens within their own families.
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Our kingdom vision reminds us that we need to hold tightly to Christ’s redemptive work on the cross. No longer are we bound by the Fall or called to perpetuate the effects of it! We are called to live in a redemptive reality, which is counter to worldly division.
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It’s not fair, we might think! If only they had not eaten of the fruit, men and women would be serving side-by-side without the scourge of dominance to distort their view of one another. Work would be fulfilling for all of us and we would not be struggling with the never-ending, unattainable quest for balance.
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I once wholly believed in a patriarchal view—not only believed it, but lived it. I didn’t care if it didn’t feel good, I cared about obeying God.
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Complementarianism framed our world, even before we knew what it was called. Yet the practice of complementarianism troubled us. It troubled us so much that we finally decided to challenge it. The Making of Biblical Womanhood tells this story.
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The story of Ruth can offer us a way forward into God’s redemptive loving-kindness.
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Life doesn’t come with a manual, and neither does marriage. Whether we’re making difficult decisions, entering new seasons, or dealing with unexpected changes, most of us married folks are just figuring it out as we go.
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