Welcome to CBE’s Library

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The well-known words in Ecclesiastes —“a cord of three strands is not quickly broken” (Eccles. 4:12b) — are often used to create a visual icon in our minds of the marriage bond.

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Our values as egalitarians should affect not only the model of marriage and work we pick, but also the way we structure our lives.

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There is no love in patriarchy. There is no respect. There is only perpetual immaturity, dependency, and frustration for the man who is subjected to the most sophisticated manipulation as his wife gives over control and authority to him.

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When I was asked to lead a single adult ministry in my church, my response was a quick and emphatic “No!” 

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For too long, I’ve made excuses for not being present and for being less than a full partner in the life of my family. To be a father means to not just hope for a world where my wife and daughters can flourish; it means helping to bring that world into being.

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Two years ago, I made friends with a woman in another state via social media. We communicated through Facebook and Instagram, and sometimes on Twitter. She was thoughtful, caring, and generous. She wrote about her children, her family, and the ways God was working in her life. She has several kids, and always seemed to be laughing about the ups and downs of raising a big family. I admired her, was maybe even a little jealous of her overflowing life.

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Soft patriarchy makes men kings who play at being one with their subjects, but requires them to keep their crowns. It retains the kind of power-over structure that Jesus gave up when he became human. 

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The story that “women need love and men need respect” is simple and appealing, but is one with a dirty little secret (okay, maybe it’s not that much of a secret): it places all the power in a relationship squarely in the hands of men.

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Watching God engage different cultures is not just a trendy exercise in diversity; it reveals something about our God. The gospel challenges every culture in unique ways, and is incarnated uniquely in each one.

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This article reports on a study of the ideologies and decision-making of Christian married couples. We specifically explored the beliefs these couples held regarding decision-making at the beginning of their marriages, those they currently hold, and what prompted any changes in those beliefs across time.

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